Going by the articles, blogs and what not media available on the internet, it seems next to impossible, for a constant worrier like myself, to have good and healthy relationships. It seems as if everything that can go wrong will go wrong and I’ll end up alone.
Where does it end? Where does one draw the line? How does one judge the direction in which the relationship is going? And when the mind is racing, at 200 km/hr, with negative scenarios and you’re told to be positive. It feels like you’re being asked to put sudden breaks to your Ferrari, assuming it can go to that speed. Ultimate recipe for a crash, don’t you think so.
Let’s say, if by a miracle, one finds that positive ground to stand on. The moment you step on it, you know its not right. You know it’s shaky and that it can come down any moment. And come down it does, the moment the erstwhile Ferrari of thoughts passes by. All for being positive.
At times, forming and maintaining an emotional bond seems such a humongous task that it feels better to be alone. And not to forget that thin line of emotional dependency. Once crossed, you can most certainly say good bye to your peace of mind. Look look..there it goes. Tata! Adios!
You can talk about it all you want, try all the meditation in the world, speak to yourself those positive self-affirmations, visualise pictures of a beautiful future and much more. They work but only for the time being. They’re like pain killers. They will subside the pain but not treat the root cause of it.
Honestly, don’t even get me started on finding the root cause. That’s another beast altogether. You walk into your psyche with a magnifying glass, in search of that little fellow, hiding in a warm corner of your brain sitting cozily somewhere. What you find instead is a pandora’s box. At this point, you’re too far off in the process to heed to any warnings so you happily open it. Only to unleash more misery upon yourself. BOOM! Oh! You’ll be missed peace of mind. RIP.
A word about communication. Even a naive relationship advisor would confirm that communication is the key to a happy relationship. But what they won’t tell you is how much is sufficient? What should you reveal, at what point and what you shouldn’t? What to do if you feel like you’re communicating too much? A piece of advise, there’s nothing you can do about it except accepting the fact that the information is already gone. I know that feeling sucks but hey whats the worst that could happen. 🙂
Sometime back I read an article that said that when going into a relationship help other person in understanding you, don’t just expect them to know what’s in your mind. Something akin to drawing up an instruction manual about yourself. Great isn’t it! But it did not say what to do when you’re the only one believing this stuff. :/
If you’ve reached till here and are thinking, “Dude! You’re overthinking. Take a chill pill.” I am totally with you on this. We’re on the same page. I concur. Trust me, I do not challenge your opinion. I second that. You couldn’t be more right. You’re right my friend. Okay. Okay. I’ll stop. I value your opinion. I think you understand me. You got that correct. Oh! My God..how did you know!
Well, take a chill pill buddy and let’s hmmm. For now, that’s all we can do. 🙂